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I Can Smell That Cheap Clone From Here
Golanclone
Season Pilot, Episode 5
Vital statistics
Air date February 1, 2014
Written by Unknown
Directed by Unknown
Episode guide
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Deer Uncle Gerald Dylan Crushes Reading

Richard is on the roof, trying to turn Christmas decorations into Easter decorations. Meanwhile, Golan, Dylan, and Alexis are inside, coloring Easter eggs. When Alexis explains the meaning of Easter to Golan, he decides to die and come back to life after two days, in order to win himself more acolytes than Jesus.

Dylan uses Golan's Gkruoolian Tome to concoct a temporary death potion, but it turns out the pages were stuck together with bunny chocolate, so she made the potion wrong, so instead of killing him, it causes him to poop out a large cocoon. Meanwhile, Carole wants Golan to apologize to a guy who works at a "Yogurt Prince," which Golan had destroyed yesterday. He doesn't want to do so, so he and Dylan hide in the tree fort and wait for him to leave. As soon as they go out, the cocoon hatches into an exact replica of Golan. Carole tells the replicant, who she assumes is the real Golan, to go search for survivors of his rampage. After rescuing a woman from the rubble of the Yogurt Prince, the guy who worked there tells "Golan" he was the one who had destroyed the place, and is always doing such things. The new Golan feels great remorse, and decides to be a monster no more. Golan and Dylan later see a news report on the TV show "You Betcha!" about how Golan has turned over a new leaf, and they're appalled that the copycat Golan is undoing his legacy of terror. So they go down to the Oak Grove School for Blind Children, where the new Golan is reading to the blind kids (whom the old Golan had blinded). But when the real Golan finds out everyone loves the new Golan because he's nice, he decides to prove he can be even nicer, himself, which troubles Dylan.

Later, at the Easter Egg-Stravaganza, Golan begins trying to get people to worship him by convincing them he's nice, now. His efforts aren't working out very well, so the new Golan offers to teach him how to be nice. Dylan gets fed up with Golan's sudden desire to be nice instead of evil, and quits being his acolyte. That night, the two Golans are having some beers at the Spaghetti Barn, and old Golan talks about an idea to make people happy. But then new Golan reveals that he's just been pretending to be nice to get people to worship him, and shows old Golan his plan to conquer Minnesota and then the entire Earth. Later, the two Golans are driving on a mountain road, when new Golan tells old Golan he has to apologize to Dylan, in order to trick everyone into thinking he's changed. But since Golan never apologizes for anything, he instead stops driving, jumps out of the car, tucks and rolls, and the car goes over a cliff, killing new Golan. Then the one and only Golan goes home, tells Dylan what happened, and makes her apologize for quitting.

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